# Feedback going up: your blind spots > How to ask your team how you lead, what to do with what you hear, and how not to punish honesty. - Course: [From Specialist to Manager: Your First Year Leading a Team](https://productovi.com/courses/from-specialist-to-manager.md) - Module: One-to-ones and feedback - Lesson 7/32, ~24 min - Source: https://productovi.com/courses/from-specialist-to-manager/feedback-going-up ## What a lead can't see **Sofia:** Iryna's feedback surprised me. I had no idea that answering fast was pulling refund questions away from Olha. **Alex Tutor:** That's a **blind spot**: an effect of your own behavior that others see and you don't. Every lead has some. The question is who tells you about them. **Alex Tutor:** First, pin down the idea. > **Exercise:** Your fast refund answer on Thursday's call pulled refund questions away from Olha's rotation, and you didn't notice. What kind of problem is this? **Sofia:** I end every one-to-one with "Any feedback for me?" Everyone says "No, all good." **Alex Tutor:** Two reasons. The question is too wide: people have to search their memory on the spot. And you now decide their shifts and their review. Criticizing that person feels risky, even with a former peer. **Alex Tutor:** So silence tells you nothing. **Upward feedback** has to be asked for, made specific and made safe. > **Exercise:** Why does "Any feedback for me?" at the end of every one-to-one keep getting "No, all good"? ## Ask narrow, ask often **Alex Tutor:** Ask about one specific thing you did: "When I reply in the team chat within a minute, does it help you or get in the way?" "What's one thing I did in the rotation this week that slowed you down?" **Alex Tutor:** One question per one-to-one, every week. When it's routine, it stops feeling like a test. And offer writing: some people find it easier to type than to say to your face. **Sofia:** What about an anonymous survey? **Alex Tutor:** In a team of four, "anonymous" is thin: people guess who wrote what, and so will you. Four answers also swing with one person's mood. Use it as a hint to ask about, not a verdict, and never try to work out who said it. > **Exercise:** Which questions are **narrow enough** to get real upward feedback? Select all that apply. **Alex Tutor:** And that anonymous survey idea? > **Exercise:** You run an anonymous survey in the team of four. One answer says “the lead takes decisions back”. What do you do with it? ## When Olha answers **Alex Tutor:** You try it at Olha's one-to-one: "When I make changes to the rotation, how does that land for you?" **Olha:** Since you ask. You said I decide how the rotation works. Then on Wednesday you changed the order in the chat yourself, without a word to me. So do I decide, or not? **Sofia:** But Taras was offline that day! I had to… **Alex Tutor:** Pause there. The reason may be real, but explaining now sounds like "you're wrong". Listen to the end, thank her, ask for anything else, then say what you'll do and by when. **Alex Tutor:** And she's right about the gap: decision rights that you take back on a busy day weren't really handed over. That's the blind spot she just showed you. > **Exercise:** You had told Olha she decides how the rotation works. On Wednesday you changed the order in the chat yourself, without a word to her, and in her one-to-one she has just said so: “So do I decide, or not?” Put your response in order. ## Don't punish honesty **Alex Tutor:** People decide whether to be honest again by watching what happens next. Arguing back, "well, you also…", a colder tone that week, or telling others who said it: any one of these ends upward feedback for months. **Alex Tutor:** Which reactions would end it? > **Exercise:** Olha has given you honest upward feedback. Which reactions are likely to end upward feedback from the team for months? Select all that apply. **Sofia:** And if the feedback is unfair? **Alex Tutor:** Thank them anyway, and take a day. You can add context later, once, calmly: "I thought about it. Here's what I'll change, and here's one thing I'll keep, and why." **Alex Tutor:** Then close the loop. A few weeks later: "You told me the rotation order kept changing. Since then, only you change it." That sentence earns the next honest answer. > **Exercise:** **True or false:** if a report's upward feedback is unfair, the lead should correct the record on the spot, so the misunderstanding doesn't spread. ## Sorting what you hear **Sofia:** By Friday I have five comments. Do I have to change all of them? **Alex Tutor:** No. Sort them into three piles: change now; explain why not; think and come back by a date. Each pile is an honest answer. The one dishonest answer is silence. **Alex Tutor:** Watch for repeats. Two people independently naming the same habit is a pattern worth acting on. One comment once is a data point: ask the team a neutral question about it, without naming who raised it. **Iryna:** Tell me what you change. Nothing builds a new lead's credibility with me faster than "they told me, and I fixed it". > **Exercise:** Match each piece of upward feedback with a fitting response. ## Your turn: answer Olha **Alex Tutor:** Back to Olha's one-to-one. She has just said you took the rotation back on Wednesday. You're tempted to explain Taras being offline. **Sofia:** So: no defending. Thank her, check I understood, say what changes, and when she'll see it. **Alex Tutor:** And cover the next busy day. Taras will be offline again. What happens then, and who decides? **Olha:** I'm listening. > **Exercise:** Write what you'd say to Olha **right after** she tells you that you changed the rotation order on Wednesday without her, in 3–5 sentences. Thank her, check you understood, say what changes and when she'll see it, and cover the next day someone is offline. > **Key ideas** > > - A **blind spot** is an effect of your behavior others see and you don't. Reports rarely volunteer it: the question is too wide and the power gap is real. > - Ask for **upward feedback** narrowly and routinely: one question about one specific thing you do, every one-to-one, with a written option. > - In a team of four, an anonymous survey isn't really anonymous and swings with one answer: a hint to ask about, never a hunt for the author. > - When you hear it: listen to the end, thank, ask for an example, say what you'll do and by when. No arguing back, no "you also", no colder tone. > - Sort what you hear: change now, explain why not, or come back by a date. Then close the loop so people see honesty works. **Alex Tutor:** Next: the month's case. Taras closes the most tickets, and too many of them come back. - Previous lesson: [Feedback on behavior, not on character](https://productovi.com/courses/from-specialist-to-manager/feedback-on-behavior.md) - Next lesson: [Case: Taras is fast and cuts corners](https://productovi.com/courses/from-specialist-to-manager/fast-and-cutting-corners-case.md) --- Productovi Learning. Free, no sign-up needed to read.